#WagePeace: Tackling Conflict
- Set your objectives
- (Hint: the goal is not for you to win and them to lose)
- 1) To make an ally 2) to prevent/stop harm 3) to solve the problem
- Know the problem
- (Hint: it’s not your own opinion on the problem)
- Conflict happens for a reason. Ask why? What are the facts?
- Know your ‘opponent’
- (Hint: not to take advantage their weaknesses)
- Why do they feel the way they do? What’s important to them? Where do you have similarities? Listen to understand not to convince! Respect ≠ agreement.
- Know yourself
- (Hint: you are not all knowing)
- Why do you feel the way you do? What if you’re wrong? What will make your life better?
2. Armor Up
- You choose how it affects you
- Deflect negative emotions and words -- don’t internalize them. Accept your feelings; then move on. Don’t give them power over you by allowing them to change how you view yourself or behave. Being tough requires tough skin.
- You choose how you respond
- Lashing out might feel good in the moment, but does it help you achieve what’s needed? Your actions. Your choice.
3. Aim True
- Attack the problem not the person
- Don’t take the bait, get distracted, or take cheap shots.
- Keep your eye on the prize
- Forget your different positions. What do they really care about? Think family, security, being understood...etc. Together, come up with ways to get what you both need/want.
- Prepare to reassess and reload
- Rome wasn’t built in a day. It may take many interactions and tactics. Sometimes you may miss the mark, but keep at it. Peace is a process. And the most powerful transformations start under the surface.